Q and A: Will My Girlfriend Come Back To Me?

Q: My name is ****. My girlfriend +++  and I broke up a year ago, and we haven't talked since, but I can't stop thinking about her. We've were together off and on for two years before that. My friends set me up with ###, but I'm not sure if I want to get to know her with +++ on my mind so much. Will +++ and I ever get back together? If so, when and how? If not, will I end up with ###? What is my love life going to end up like? I'm so confused I feel like I'm loosing my mind.

A: I've said it before, and I'll say it again. The future depends on your choices, there is no "end up", just the consequences of your choices...and other people's choices too.

That why romance questions are the hardest of all in Tarot. There isn't a way to know what is in ### or +++ heart and mind. Even if there was a way to know what they are thinking and feeling, I wouldn't use it = out of respect for their dignity and privacy. Would you want them know your innermost thoughts and feelings without your permission??

Let's look at this logically, step by step. Sometimes it takes logic to balance out an emotional situation, just like intuition and spirituality can guide us in times where logic can't.

First, no, you are not loosing your mind. It's an old adage...if you think you are, you're not, because people who have real issues usually don't think they have any. I've done readings for people all over the world, and this is a very, very common question and feeling. Thinking about a lost love is difficult, emotional...and normal.

As for getting back together with +++, there are reasons you kept breaking up in the first place. Have any of those reasons changed, really? If you haven't talked to each other in a year, what would have in common to build a relationship on?? Anything is possible, but given your two's history of multiple breakups, and the year that has passed, I'd say the chances of you two having a successful relationship at any point is very, very small.

As for ###, how things go from here is up to you AND ###. It is up to you if you want to let your old relationship dominate your life, or if you want to move on and let yourself heal over time. Whether that healing process includes getting to know  ### (or not)  is up to you to decide. There is another option..."none of the above"...you could spend some time on your own in no love relationship at all to heal, put yourself back together, and be the best you that you can be for the next relationship down the road, whether that is with ###, with +++ or with someone you haven't even met yet.

I know that didn't include any Tarot cards, and wasn't the kind of reading you may have been expecting, but it is the honest answer, given the way Tarot works. It is all about choices, not predictions, and so much is up to you at this point, the cards can't really be of any good help.

Try reading the post about "how to find your soulmate", and give those ideas a little thought. My hunch is that will help more than a tarot reading right now, anyway.

Good luck!

www.ModernOracleTarot.com

Question for a Question

Q:  Will T***** ever come back to me? I know G***** is interested in me - will we get together? Will I ever get married?


A.  Hi C******


I know you've read my blog and website, so you know what I think about predictions. Did you read those "How to find your soulmate" blog posts I sent you? I'm guessing, no. Here are the links again, in case you lost them.


http://modernoracletarot.blogspot.com/2009/09/how-to-find-your-soulmate.html/


http://modernoracletarot.blogspot.com/2010/04/how-to-find-your-soulmate-part-2.html


I'll do a three card yes/no reading for you on two conditions...


1. You write back and tell me how YOU would feel if a stranger from the internet suddenly started reading your mind, reading how you feel, and predicting what you are going to do to your EX


and


2. You promise that you understand that predicting the future like this is impossible. YOU create the future through your choices...and these guys have their own choices to make too. Promise me that you realize any reading I do for a question like this is about as valid as one of those magic 8 ball toys.


I don't mean to be snarky and rude, but thinking about other people and taking responsibility for your part in this really is important thing to learn...especially in relationship questions. We've worked together enough, I know you can handle the bigger ideas.

How to spot your soulmate

Q. How do I know my soulmate when I see them?

A. It sounds simple at first, but this is really a complex and kind of deep question. My answer is just as cryptic...look with your heart, not your eyes.

On the surface, the idea of "seeing" your Soulmate seems to look at superficial things...and superficial nonsense predictions. It reminds of that old cliche of a storefront gypsy "psychic" staring at a crystal ball and pronouncing in a dramatic accent that you will meet a "tall, dark handsome stranger"

Soulmates aren't about appearances any more than psychic readings are about predictions.

Soulmate relationships are about love, compassion, closeness, the weaving together of two whole, complete people who are fulfilled on their own...but who are lifted to something better by being together. Soulmates are symbiotic...the two together are greater than the sum of their parts. 

A soulmate doesn't comlete you...they aren't like a lung you were missing. Instead, a soulmate fits your life and your heart like air fits in your lungs, and are just as essential. 

How do you spot your soulmate? How do you know your soulmate when you see them? When you look with your heart and see love.

www.modern-oracle-tarot.com

Valentine's Day 2012 - How to Find Your Soulmate

I first wrote about "How to find your soulmate" in 2009. Soulmates, and finding that special someone is always a popular topic. Here is the latest edit - Happy Valentine's Day!

I get the question a lot. I ASKED the question a lot when I was younger and first started going to get psychic readings. I had no idea at the time that I would wind up doing readings and be asked that self-same eternal question - How Do I Find My Soulmate? After seeing the soulmate question from both sides, here are a few of the ideas that I've found to be most helpful.

My soulmate is a he, so I refere to "soulmate" in the masculine here. Gender doesn't matter. The same principles apply, either way.

• Don"t worry about time...love is one of those cosmic truths beyond time. It doesn't need, want or respond to our time schedules or expectations. "it happens in its own time" and "you can't hurry love" are both very true. So don't worry about WHEN. After you take that pressure off of yourself, and off of your soulmate out there, then that creates more energetic space for the relationship to step into.
• Why not let your soulmate find you? "Finding" hints at action, searching, seeking, struggling. "Finding" a soulmate is often counter-productive. If it is meant to be, it will happen naturally, and in the flow of things. Fighting the current, not 'going with the flow' only makes things harder. Think more in terms of a light in the darkness. If you are happy, relaxed, loving, compassionate, and being your genuine self, then you are more likely to attract your perfect mate to you. Not to sound like an e-harmony commercial, but they got that one right...you want to find someone who loves you for the real you - and the best way to have that happen is just to live fully, and honestly, and just BE your genuine self...not be someone on the prowl, hunting for a mate, like a wolf hunting for a rabbit. BE yourself, let your light shine, and if it is meant to be, your soulmate will be drawn to you. You might have heard that called the "law of similars"...like attracts like. If you are loving, you attract love. If you send out signals you are a hunter, you find preditors. If you send out signals of wanting to be with someone, then you find someone who mutually wants that too.
• Do things that you love to do. Going to bars or whatever with the sole purpose of "finding a soulmate" seldom works. Do something you love, and you might meet someone who loves that same thing and viola! you find someone where you have something in common to help you get things rolling. For me that was martial arts. I LOVE doing tai chi. So now I'm married to a certified national martial arts tournament judge. Same is true for any hobby, sport or activity you really enjoy. That vibe of enjoyment will help the attraction process.
• Love life. Be happy. Compassion, confidence and joie de vie are sexy and attractive.

If you have any questions, please e-mail them to faq@modern-oracle-tarot.com to be answered here in the blog. If you like what you read here, and would like a private reading with the author, please visit www.modern-oracle-tarot.com for details.

Daily meditation - Ace of Wands

Creating the future works through spiritual laws just like building something depends on physical laws. Like attracts like. To draw your soulmate into your life, be the fullest and best you that you can be.

Baihu

www.modern-oracle-tarot.com

Q&A...the healer's path

Q. I've been on a spiritual path for 3 years, and have been studying a variety of healing modalities. That work is my passion, and I would love to do it full time, but I can't afford to do that. I'm 35, and worry that I won't find my life mate. Is there anything I can do to find someone and also do more healing work? I want to help people, and it really makes me happy. Am I on the right path? What can I do to advance?

A. I can empathize with your situation. I still only do this part-time, I didn't meet my husband until I was in my 30's and about 5 years after I began a path of spirituality.

So my first impulse is to reassure you that you are doing just fine...making your living doing healing work isn't a requirement. In fact, it could be you are being kept in those other situations to bring your healing presence there...like that old saying "bloom where you are planted". You financial situation may very well be putting you right where you are most needed and doing real healing on a spiritual/emotional level rather than a physical one...your outlook, your energy, your presence alone is uplifting, soothing, healing and inspiring to those around you.

I think it was Ted Andrews who said something along the lines of if we live our lives well...if we just work and care for our loved ones and just do the best we can with what we have...then we are following our spiritual journey just fine.It was in the book "How to discover your past lives" if memory serves. I don't have it here with me at the moment to give you the exact title or quote....but you get the idea.

What healing modality do you use? I work with Reiki, and just love it! So I understand why you want to do it more, and know how happy that kind of work can make you....

I know you know the basics, but have you tried applying your healing skills to yourself and your life situation? For example, daily self-treatment, even short sessions, are often recommended for Reiki practitioners, to keep our energy up, and better let us serve others.

Also there is a little Reiki sort of ritual that my husband and I adapted that worked really well for us. I have a hunch it might be helpful to you too.

First, pick the one thing that weighs most on your mind...the one single thing that your intuition tells you is first on the list and is the doorway to all the other things...it could be time/finances to spend more time with your healing work. Or it may be drawing your life mate to you. Or whatever you feel is important. Although I have a hunch the two are connected...that doing your healing work will put you in the right place to meet your life mate...for this method it is important to pick just one thing at a time, and phrase it in a positive, present tense way. I find it helpful to write or focus only on a word or short phrase, like "healing work" or "prosperity" or "soulmate".

You might even want to write it down on a piece of paper. Then hold that piece of paper...or at least that one laser-focused idea in your hands, and send healing energy to it, just as you would in any healing session....be it Reiki or otherwise. Put your love, healing and passion into it. I enjoy Taoist philosophy, so we also lit a stick of incense while we were doing this, to symbolize our desire being lifted up and then released. After giving the energy, and allowing the request to be given to the universe, we "released" it...instead of holding on to an expected outcome, we just took the attitude of asking for fulfillment in whatever way is the "loving highest and best" as one of my old teachers used to say.

Repeat this for seven or 21 days in a row, whichever feels right to you. Don't skip a day...if you do, clear, and then restart the process. 7 days is easier (and I think just as effective) as the longer series. After one series, rest for at least 7 days, and during that time focus on being patient and trusting the universe is unfolding as it should. Then you can repeat the process for other concerns as your intuition guides you.

Since you are advanced along the spiritual path, I feel guided to do a one card meditation type of reading for you. I'll pull one card, but I'd like you to meditate on it for a bit, and see what your own intuition gives you about it too. You have good skills in that way too, and they shouldn't be left out of this process.

That being said, I also feel guided to say that you are on the right path...this card is just an idea to help you advance further along that right-way.

The card that came up is the 4 of swords, meaning flexibility. The reminds me of the old adage about the willow that bends can not break, even in a strong wind. Keeping an open mind about when an how you serve will open up many more opportunities for you to do just exactly that...there will be more ways for you to follow your passion. Here I 'see' a fan or a tree like shape, with much opening and branching out from the point where you are now, as if this is only the beginning of an expanding life path.

I am also reminded of something another teacher told me "All changes, even the most longed for, require that we die to one life before we can be born into another." ~Joy Star
Is there something from your "old" life, before you began the spiritual path 3 years ago, that is holding you back, or is there something that is painful or difficult to release? Moving along the spiritual, healing path often requires that we let go of our old self image, and adopt a new one...to really start thinking of ourselves as 'healer' instead of 'student' 'worker' or whatever old identities may have become ingrained. That is why meditation is so often recommended in this life path...it helps you see old thought habits that may or may not serve you now. Here again, flexibility like the 4 of swords suggests can be helpful.

I am also reminded of a quote by Walter Lubeck, a respected Reiki Teacher..."give yourself permission to be strange". Being a healer means being out of the crowd and off the beaten path...even for mainstream medical doctors. There is an element of "different" in the healers of every culture and time.

I hope this helps a little bit. I certainly wish you all the best as you travel the healing path!

How to Find your Soulmate part 2

A. writes:

I'm 23 and single. I feel that my soulmate is out there, and that we will be together, but I wonder when. I know we'll be together when we have learned what we need to learn to be perfect together. What do I need to learn? What do I have to do to be perfect for him? I haven't made a 'list' because the things I want are caring, concern, understanding and the like. What else do I need to learn?

Your question shows beyond a doubt that this is something close to your heart and soul, and that you have put a great deal of love and thought into this! In fact, you have very nearly answered your own question, no cards required! What I'd like to do, in fact, is give you a few ideas to think about in addition to what you've written here...things that helped me just when I was in your situation in the past...

Probably the two biggest helps for a situation like this was advice from my teacher Sallie Christensen and from reading Richard Bach...in fact, if you are a reader at all, I would suggest first "Illusions: the adventures of a reluctant messiah" and "Bridge Across Forever" by Richard Bach if you haven't read them already.

I think you are right on the money with the idea that you haven't met your soulmate as a matter of readiness. But what if it is his readiness and not yours? What can you learn from this waiting time?

The obvious lessons are patience, and the importance of the two over the one and all that...

But there is more, and my hunch is that the key for you is happiness and manifestation rather than patience, and compassion for others above yourself...here is what I mean by that.

You "get it" about wanting the right things, You get it about this being about spirituality, intangible qualities, and love above all...

So what's the hold up you might ask?

Two things...first is a last chance, so to speak. Once you are in a long term soulmate relationship or marriage, you are a different person. Things will never quite be the same again. You can't cross the same river twice as they say. Your soulmate and the universe may just be giving you a moment to breath. This might be a chance to take one last look around, breath in the fragrance of the GOOD parts of the hear and now, a chance to be happy, enjoy and appreciate the way life is now before moving on to bigger and better things. A graduation party so to speak.

Another, and possibly more important opportunity here is a chance to learn the feel and process of manifestation / attraction.

I realize you are an advance student, and are probably well aware of those concepts, like attracts like and all that. This is a good opportunity to really feel, know and EXPERIENCE it.

"The list" is usually a first step for people who haven't really come to terms with what they want with the clarity that you have. But that doesn't mean it has to be all literal and physical attributes. Writing the caring and compassion you envision will help bring it into your life as much as wanting blue eyes or something. In fact, my belief is that those attributes are more important than a list of physical characteristics and, because you feel most deeply about them, they will manifest more strongly.

If you are spiritual and intuitive enough to know and trust that your soulmate really is out there, sometimes it is easy to forget the nuts and bolts part, and flounder in the physical, actually meeting part of things. Like Sallie told me once - you are so attuned to looking for your soulmate that you send out an "I'm taken" vibe.

Instead of "I have a soulmate and I KNOW he is out there and just waiting for us to be ready to meet" Try sending a different wish to the universe...send the message through the ether directly to your soulmate (whoever, where-ever and when-ever he is), that you are receptive and ready..."I want you, I am ready for you, please come to me". Maybe try making that list of soulmate qualities as a way of inviting him into your life...put all the caring understanding intangible qualities right at the top, put the things most important to you first...than keep going and include every last little detail.

Then, as always, put the list away, trusting things to manifest in their own good time. To paraphrase: "the best way to make the universe laugh is to tell it your plans"...or in the words of that old Phil Collins song..."you can't hurry love". The universe, your love and your relationship with your soulmate is unfolding just as it should...no matter what the calendar says.

I hope that helps, at least a little. Keep up the good work. I think you are totally on the right track, and things will unfold in time. Be patient with your soulmate, and yourself. You'll meet when you are both perfectly ready. In the mean time, enjoy the hear and now, and use this time to learn the feeling of manifesting good things into your life. Like attracts like, what we send out to the universe comes back to us...those are important lessons. We all could use a reminder of that from time to time.

Baihu

www.modern-oracle-tarot.com

P.S. As a reminder... there are no such things as predictions, so no one can predict when or where or how you will meet your "soulmate"...read "Alice Got it Right: Twilight Predicts the Future" for more information.

FAQ - "How accurate are you?"

The answer is simple: Accuracy is in the eye of the beholder.

It is all very Albert Einstein, really. The "accuracy" of any given psychic, or of any given reading hinges directly on the expectations of the person getting the reading, and their ability to think symbolically and abstractly.

If you were expecting to see a specific percentage answer by now, you might not like what follows. But if you are curious about how psychic "accuracy" realistically works, please read on.

Let's look at two examples - one drawn from years of doing Tarot readings, the other drawn from science.

I've said it before, and I'll say it again...this is only to draw a parallel between the two schools of thought. In no way is this to say that science proves intuition or vice-versa. Both are radically different facets of the human experience. I believe when we find similar patterns in such different fields, it hints to a higher truth, an underlying reality that supports both...not one causing or explaining the other...

But back to psychic "accuracy"...

One of the most common questions I hear is someone wanting to know when they will meet the love of their life or what will happen in their current love relationship.

If the sitter expects, and can only accept a specific answer, then the accuracy rate will be exactly 0%. Sure, it would be nice, and make your life easy if a psychic could tell you that your soulmate would be waiting at the bus stop on January 14 at 5:08 pm. But what higher purpose would that serve? What could you learn from that? How could it help you make a better life for yourself or become a better person??

What if the answer was from a different, larger perspective. What if the psychic message was that it is important to get your career in order before you focus on romance?

That may indeed be what needs to happen for the sitter (the person getting a psychic reading) to have a happy lifelong relationship. That message might be totally 100% accurate - but if all the sitter is willing to hear is specifics, like date or time...then that reading appears totally unrelated and inaccurate.

Let's take this example one step further. Suppose in addition to the message about career and romance, the image of 'violets' also came through. If the sitter thinks only with fixed, preconceived expectations, the notion of "violets" might seem like random nonsense. BUT if the sitter looks at it from a symbolic mindset, they might remember that violets were their Grandmother's favorite flower...and Grandmother had always told stories about how stressful the Great Depression had been on her marriage.

True, modern psychology might call such associations a little "loose". Personally, I think these Synchronicities and symbols are meaningful and relevant. So again, if you expect date, time and place specifics, a psychic reading is not accurate. If you are willing to see the big picture, consider personal growth and life dynamics, if you are willing to be open to symbols and associations...then psychic readings can be right on the mark.

I promised you a scientific parallel. Remember the example from Relativity? Think about a man on a moving train, walking to his seat in the front of the train car. From the viewpoint of his fellow passengers, he is only moving forward a few steps. From the viewpoint of someone on the ground by the railroad tracks, that same man goes whizzing by at 70 miles per hour. If you could somehow sit on the sun, then that same man would be moving 67,062 miles per hour along with the rest of the Earth in its orbit. (source: http://curious.astro.cornell.edu/question.php?number=356)

The same idea of relative viewpoint applies to psychic readings. In math terms, it is a direct proportion. Narrower expectations means little accuracy. The broader the view, the greater the accuracy becomes.

Going back to the romance question: Look at the reading from the viewpoint of exact date time and place and the reading has little accuracy. From the viewpoint of general advice, the reading has a high degree of accuracy. If you add the symbolic validation of the 'violets' association, then the accuracy is even more convincing.

When it comes to psychic readings, the broader view lets you put aside idea "accuracy" all together, and focus on things like "compassion", "learning", "spirituality" and so on.

To get an 'accurate' psychic reading, approach it as if you were sitting on the sun, not riding in a rail car.

Wishing all of you perspective and inspiration.

“The male/female energies within oneself, once balanced, carries over to all affairs of the heart”…Joy Star of www.psychicjoystar.com

That is just like my teacher, Joy. She can put in a sentence things I barely articulate in a page. This is exactly what I was babbling about in the ‘how to find your soulmate’ post.

Once you are whole, balanced and happy in and of yourself…then you are able to be balanced, strong, loving and supportive of someone else. Once you are balanced, healed, and whole within yourself, then you are ready for a soulmate, and will attract them into your life as they attract you into theirs.

Just a quick reminder that blog will be offline for the G-20 summit. E-mail readings are still available no appointment needed, but there may be a 24 hour delay or so due to the summit. Full details available at www.modern-oracle-tarot.com. I’ll be writing blog posts offline next week – so look forward to some longer posts after the G-20. Welcome to Pittsburgh G-20!

HOW TO FIND YOUR SOULMATE

I get the question a LOT. I asked the question a LOT when I was younger and first started going to get psychic readings. Little did I know then that I would wind up doing this kind of work. After seeing the soulmate question from both sides, I have a few ideas that I offer to almost every client that comes to me with questions like "how do I find my soulmate". It works the same for everyone, although the he-she in this is written as if the questioner was female. Gender doesn't matter. The same principles apply.

If you have any questions, please e-mail them to faq@modern-oracle-tarot.com to be answered here in the blog. General questions only. Please direct personal reading orders to www.modern-oracle-tarot.com.

First, is to not worry about time...love is one of those cosmic truths beyond time. It doesn't need, want or respond to our time schedules or expectations. "it happens in its own time" and "you can't hurry love" are both very true. So don't worry about WHEN. After you take that pressure off of yourself, and off of your soulmate out there, then that creates more energetic space for the relationship to step into.

Second, why not let your soulmate find you? The outward, struggling quality of "finding" a soulmate is often counter-productive. If it is meant to be, it will happen naturally, and in the flow of things. Fighting the current, not 'going with the flow' only makes things harder. Think more in terms of a light in the darkness. If you are happy, relaxed, loving, compassionate, and being your genuine self, then you are more likely to attract your perfect mate to you. Not to sound like an e-harmony commercial, but they got that one right...you want to find someone who loves you for the real you - and the best way to have that happen is just to live fully, and honestly, and just BE your genuine self...not be someone on the prowl, hunting for a mate, like a wolf hunting for a rabbit. BE yourself, let your light shine, and if it is meant to be, your soulmate will be drawn to you. You might have heard that called the "law of similars"...like attracts like. If you are loving, you attract love. If you send out signals you are a hunter, you find preditors. If you send out signals of wanting to be with someone, then you find someone who mutually wants that too.

Third, do things that you love to do. Going to bars or whatever with the sole purpose of "finding a soulmate" seldom works. Do something you love, and you might meet someone who loves that same thing and viola! you find someone where you have something in common to help you get things rolling. For me that was martial arts. I LOVE doing tai chi. So now I'm married to a certified national martial arts tournament judge. Same is true for any hobby, sport or activity you really enjoy. That vibe of enjoyment will help the attraction process.

I hope that helps a little.

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