27 September 2012

Q&A: Where can we have a happy marriage?

Q: We like where we live now, but my husband has better job offers in two different places. We've decided we want to make the move for the promotion. They are both pretty equal job offers, so it has come down to location for us, but we can't decide between xxxxxx, where the housing costs are better than here (we could get out from under our mortgage) but the weather is hot and humid, and we both hate that. The other offer is in zzzzzz, but the housing there costs a little bit more, but the weather is just gorgeous  We really can't decide between the two, can the cards offer any guidance? Where can we go that would give us a happy marriage in the years to come?

A: Hello ******.

Let's look at this with a simple yes/no reading...but before we start I have to say this...

It doesn't matter one tiny bit where you live. It looks to me like the heart of your question is wanting to keep a happy marriage...that happens in your heart, not in where you live.

 You can live anywhere in the universe, and be happy with a happy marriage. If the relationship is good, it will be good in a shack in the middle of a swamp. If the relationship is in trouble, then it would be troubled in a free mansion in paradise. 

Also, before pulling the yes/no cards...think about the criteria you already mentioned...cost and weather. Which of those two things is more important AND which of those two things will affect your happiness the most? Is hot an humid going to wear on you over the years or will money concerns be a bigger strain? 

PLUS don't forget, nothing is permanent...if you get somewhere, and don't like it, you can move again. Instead of buying right away, why not rent a while to see if you like the area? What other things besides mortgage and weather would make you happy where you live? What do you want to avoid? Maybe it would help this decision to expand your list of pros and cons. If you consider lots of things, it might be easier to see which location has the more plus - things and which has more minus - things.

..and also lift the burden of permanence. Stay mobile, and wait to tie in to a mortgage once you are sure it is the right place for you. That way you can make your decision about where you want to live based on something other than the weather... like lifestyle, recreation, taxes, schools (if that applies), career opportunities etc etc

So leaving marriage and happiness totally out of it (that part is up to you two, no matter where you live)...

"Should ****** and spouse move to zzzzzzz"... (one ace, two minor arcana cards)leaning toward no...this is the patter of you COULD...but SHOULD you? Things to consider here is balance, and clear-thinking. Would you lifestyle here pull things out of balance? Would you have to work such long hours to afford the house that other parts of your life would suffer? Are you seeing this area as it really is? Or do you have an idealized real estate booklet and tourist attraction sort of impression of this place?

"Should ******* and spouse move to xxxxxxx"?... (two aces and a minor arcana card) leaning yes...the drawback might be that it will take some daring and mental toughness to make it work. It may be rocky at the start, but you can overcome the challenges. It may feel like you made the wrong choice to begin, but be brave, and you will be rewarded in surprising ways, personal growth, awakening, happiness ways...in time, if you have courage. There is great potential for spiritual lessons and soul-satisfaction here, independent of finances.

I hope that helps the decision making process along for you. Good Luck!


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