19 May 2011

Advice on an ex-boyfriend from the 3 of cups

Q.

My boyfriend **** and I broke up about 2 months ago, and he went to live with a new girlfriend. After 3 weeks apart, we started talking again. Every time it winds up in an argument. We get angry and argue about who loves the other more, but he is still goes right back to his girlfriend. Should I follow my heart and keep fighting for him? What should I do?

A.

I think there are some other psychic techniques that might help you more than Tarot. Let's talk about those for a minute, then we will do the closest Tarot reading to that...the single card meditation. With that kind of tarot reading, you think about the card over the next several days, tune in to its message, and look for how it connects with any other coincidences in your life to help guide you.

To start with, I think you would benefit more from a technique called "creative visualization". There are some good books on that topic, especially one recommended to me that was written by Shakti Gawain.

I see you are from ************, so I'm sure you have heard of good old Dr. Phil. I've worked with psychologists and psychiatrists before, and he's right about one thing..."the past is the best predictor of future behavior"

Look at what you yourself wrote here....******* is your EX boyfriend...there is some reason that your relationship ended in the first place. What was it? Has that problem been truly fixed, or is this more of the same?

Look at the words in your question...look how many times you've used words like argue and anger...and the word "loves" only once. I think that is telling you something right there. Look at the time you have known him as a whole. How much of it has been happy, and how much of it has had problems to one extent or another? Have you spent more time happy or more time arguing? Even the time you've been apart has been half arguing and unhappy. Based on the REALITY of the past, what can you expect from the future with *******? People can change, but the only change you can expect is change from yourself. You can NOT control his part in this, only yours. You can't expect him to be different unless he chooses to do so. What has he chosen?

Finally, actions speak louder than words. What does his being and staying with his current girlfriend ... in spite of your recent contact... tell you? What does it tell you that you talk about "his girlfriend" in your question as being someone else...you realize deep down that "his girlfriend" isn't you, at least not now. You don't even think of yourself as his ex as much as you think of him as yours. Does that tell you anything? Why are you holding on when he seems to have moved on?

You say you argue about who loves who more...if you really love each other, why do you show your love in such an angry, soul-violent way? Why do you love him? Do you love him so much that this is worth the pain? What is so great about all this that you can't do without it? Do you really care for him, or are you in love with the idea of stability, and being in a relationship? What about you? Do you care for your own self and well-being at all? What is the best and most loving course of action for everyone...including you?

Passion is important, yes, but it isn't always everything. You have let your emotions lead the way so far...why not try something a little different? It is ok to listen to your head a little too. Best of all is listening to love and logic combined. When things are SO heated that there are arguments, wouldn't it make sense to cool things off with a little distance, realism and cold hard logic? What does your HEAD tell you?

Here is where the visualization comes in. Sit down in a quiet place where you can have some uninterrupted time alone. Close your eyes and let your imagination flow. Imagine what life would be like with all the different possibilities. What would life be like to be back with Pedro AS HE IS, no changes in him. How would life be like to continue as things are? How would life be like to walk away from any relationship with him and begin anew for yourself, by yourself, without him? Allow each possibility to unfold fully. There is no right or wrong. Just allow it...your imagination will know what to do. What does your head and heart tell you after you have followed each of these stories to their end?

Your one card Tarot meditation is the 3 of cups: Find the good things in life. Find peace and happiness. Take comfort from friends and family and the things in life that are good to you and bring out the good in you.

This is a lot to think about...I hope you find it helpful

Best wishes to you!

Baihu
http://www.modern-oracle-tarot.com

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