09 February 2012
Soulmates and Psychics, Love and Destiny
Q. My problem is that i want to forget some of the predictions psychics have given me (i used to ask a lot). I know you would say the future is unpredictable. But some predictions did come true. That's why i am so sad, because not all of the predictions were so positive(about love) I'm not sure if they were really gifted psychics or not.
I want to know if, maybe, i have the ability to make my love life the way i want it? I know relationships depend on both partners--so does that mean that i'll probably not have the relationship turn out the way I want? (well i am not saying that i am selfish, i 'll take care of my partner too) I want to make a right choice for my future husband...can i really do this?
one psychic even told me that i have destroyed all positive things in my destiny because i asked too many questions about the future.
Please just give me some advice about how to cope with all this. Thank you.
A. You are living proof of why I believe predictions are not just impossible, but HARMFUL.
Sometimes so-called predictions catch a glimpse of what is probable and seem to come true just through probabilities, math, and logical insight. My guess is that through the things you said (or subtle body-language clues if it was an in-person reading) the psychic could see the path you were on, and how your mind was already set, and just confirmed the decisions you had already made. Predictions that say the most likely thing to happen - the most probable outcome - often do come true by means of pure statistics.
Other times, predictions come true through "self-fulfilling prophecy". By planting an idea in your head, by convincing you that a particular outcome is inevitable, a "prediction" causes you to either consciously give in or unconsciously act to cause the "prediction" to come true.
Romance questions are tricky at best, because it involves two people. We have no right to look at your potential future partner's feelings, choices and concerns without their permission. Like I tell everyone...think of how it would feel to have the shoe on the other foot. How would you feel if some psychic that you don't know anything about went rummaging around in your mind and heart for what YOU were going to do or how YOU felt about someone? It is a c creepy, and very violating to think about. I won't do it. I have a hard time respecting anyone who says they can and will do that kind of reading. One of my teachers did tell me about "etheric permission"...the significant other can give permission to participate in the reading, and volunteer to share their feelings on a etheric or soul-level, even if they don't give actual physical permission. While I have had that happen on some very very rare occasions...I will never never ever read a person that hasn't given permission, and will only trust that "etheric permission" if it is extremely crystal-clear.
That being said, there are some very real things YOU can do to help you find the right path to the right person. I've written a couple of pretty long blog posts about it. I won't re-copy all that here, but you can read it free on www.ModernOracleTarot.com. Just click the links on the right hand side of the page under the "extras" section.
What that one psychic said about your destiny and questions about the future is kind of true on one level...but absolutely ridiculous nonsense on another. Let me explain...
Relying too much on psychic predictions is a terrible idea. You can't grow, learn, or take control over your own life. By giving your personal power and decision-making over to someone else sets you on a path to learn some very difficult and very important life lessons...and learn them the hard way. So in that sense, asking for predictions and taking them to heart really does suck the life right out everything and it may SEEM that you have "destroyed all positive things". BUT what they didn't tell you is you can restore your destiny...you can CHANGE, you can LEARN, you can START making better choices, you can STOP relying on "predictions", and even get readings less often. Ted Andrews, whose writings I totally, totally respect and recommend, suggests only getting readings once or twice a year, or better still only when really needed.
I make no predictions...but my advice is to read those posts, and use the tools there to take matters into your own hand...and your own heart. The best way to attract love is to give love. To find a loving person, be a loving person.
Let your light shine. Only YOU can make you happy...not a husband, not a lover, and certainly not a psychic.